How Divorce can affect your Child’s Development

Affect of divorce on children
Image Credit – Deposit Photos

Getting a divorce is a daunting and a harrowing experience for a couple and can shatter their beliefs in the institution of marriage itself. The effect of a divorce on a child’s development can be even more traumatic, and the psychological and emotional upheaval can last a lifetime. Various studies have shown that small children unlike adolescents get affected by the divorce more as they lack a support system, which adolescents can find in their friends.

Since small children depend on their parents and look up to them, along with relying on them to fix every problem; the act of getting a divorce shatters this belief and plunges the kids into a life of uncertainty, guilt, and other problems.

Here’s how a divorce can affect the development of your children

A Sense of Loss and Insecurity

Since in the eyes of children, their parents possess superhero abilities and solve every problem for them, the process of a divorce destroys this fundamental belief. A sense of loss and insecurity then prevails, as this vital belief which is necessary for the overall development of a child, is completely broken down. This can further prolong into a feeling of rejection and can hamper the overall development of the child into a healthy and stable individual.

Guilt

A common pattern seen among children from divorced homes is a continual sense of tremendous guilt. For most children this guilt stems from the belief that somehow the divorce was their fault or that they couldn’t help reconcile things between their parents. Here it becomes the responsibility of the parents to openly talk to their children and make them understand that it’s not their fault and make them feel loved and at ease

Poor Academic Performance

The process of getting a divorce is stressful on the kids. Even before the actual divorce, most homes get drowned in negative emotions due to the sheer anger or hostility that precedes a divorce. This atmosphere of negativity and hostility leads to poor performance at school, as kids are unable to focus on their studies in an atmosphere filled with enmity. In this case the parents should be responsible to act in a manner which does not let negative feelings or emotions creep in the house and affect kids academically.

Children from Divorced Homes are Likely to be Psychologically Distressed

It is absolutely important for a child to be in a loving and caring environment to develop into a psychologically stable and mature adult. As kids look up to their parents, when they realize the inability of their caretakers to solve problems and disputes among themselves, it creates a deep psychological wound which stretches well into adulthood. This psychological distress hinders in their wholesome development and can result into adults who are not quite stable in their thoughts and behavior.

Not every child from a divorced home becomes rebellious and has a general lack of discipline and disdain for authority. A lot of them become high achievers, but that doesn’t mean they don’t get emotionally traumatized by the process. However, for most children the process of a divorce causes emotional upheaval which might lead to increased aggression.

The emotional scars that a divorce leaves on the kids is a stark reality of the turmoil caused by the process. Not every child would be affected this way or would act in a similar fashion, but a divorce definitely makes a child more susceptible and increases the risk.

What is your opinion? How do you think divorce affects a child’s development? Do you have any experience to share? We would love to hear your opinions in the comment section below.

 

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